Tragic reality - Part 1 - The bloody saturday

3rd July, 2004

There is a guarding post located in the southern part of Adora, in the backyard of the Hazan family - the father of the family was killed in a suicide bombing in 2002 in Jerusalem being 1 of the 5 victims, settlers of Adora. The other 4 were killed on 27th of April, 2002 when a squad of Palestinian militants managed to cut the fence and infiltrate the village.

The bloody saturday (Shabbath) of 27th April

Two gunmen, disguised as Israeli soldiers approached the settlement of Adora on Friday night, cut the fence and infiltrated the village. The two decided to carry out their mission in the morning - in the upper part of the settlement a new street was under construction. Villas were half built. The gunmen hid in one of the villas and spent the night there. There are still inscriptions in Arabic on the building's walls, although I don't know what they mean.















At 9a.m. in the morning, when most of the men were in synagogue or sleeping late, the terrorists carried out a house-to-house killing spree.

(the rest of the details have been quoted from http://www.ict.org.il/spotlight/det.cfm?id=771 in order to maintain accuracy)

Four residents were killed, including a five year-old girl, who was shot in the head from close range as she slept in her parents bedrooms. Seven people were injured, two critically.

Ya'acov Shefi, a policeman was attending prayers in the community's synagogue when he heard gunshots.

"It was close to nine in the morning; I heard gunshots but never dreamed it was an attack. Then I heard bursts of gunfire and became concerned. I raced toward my house and saw two people near the dining-room door - they wore army uniforms and flak jackets, and I asked them what had happened. They didn't answer and began shooting at me," he said.

Shefi ran from house to house, alerting residents that there were terrorists dressed as soldiers. At a neighbor's house he learned his daughter had been killed and his wife and two sons--aged two and four--wounded. "I saw my wife, Shiri, being carried out on a stretcher, and she called out 'they murdered our children,' " he said.

In another home, the terrorists burst into the second-story bedroom and shot a couple as they lay sleeping, killing the woman and critically injuring her husband. Their son was also shot and wounded in his bedroom.

Two additional residents were killed as they attempted to engage the gunmen. The terrorists fled back the way they had come.

Another source:

Anat Harari who was moderately wounded in the attack said that she at first thought it was Israeli soldiers - "They were only 1.5 meters away" She fled to the bathroom while the terrorists tried, unsuccessfully, to open the locked door.

The terrorists first entered Shefi's home and killed the 5 year old Danielle. Her two brothers, Uriel (2) and Eliad (4) were lightly injured and so was their mother Shir. The father, Yaakov, was at the synagogue during the attack.

The terrorists continued to the next house - Greenberg family. First they entered Nathan's room (14) and injured him moderately while he was in his sleep, then they climbed the stairs to the second floor and shot the couple in their bedroom - the wife, Kathya, was murdered. The husband, Vladimir, was heavily injured.

Outside Greenberg's house, the terrorists were confronted by the Israeli soldiers. In the exchange of fire, they've managed to kill one of the soldiers, Eric Bekker and injure another one. After the confrontation, the terrorists have successfully escaped the settlement.

As far as I know, at least 1 of the terrorists involved in the attack was killed by IDF later.

Love is the key to happiness

2nd July, 2004

There are so many guys everywhere who see girls simply as sex objects. When guys talk about their sexual experiences with their friends, they often sound as if they're talking about their owned property, things that if their girlfriends had heard them, they would have probably be deeply insulted.

For example: One of the soldiers in my room had been talking with his girlfriend. He has been 2 weeks in the army and was supposed to be released the next day. "What?! You can't do this to me." After the conversation he turned to his friends and said: "The bitch is having a period. I can't believe she's doing that to me!" As if it's her fault...

I've been thinking about my Angel. I know for certain that I would never find anyone as great as her. She's greater than a girl could ever be. Everytime I think about her, all my worries disappear and there's only one thought that comes up to my mind: "I don't care about anything in the whole world, as long as Angel is with me. Let the world end, the sun freeze, let me lose everything, I won't care because I have Angel - she is all my world. No matter how hard it is for me in the army, no matter how lonely I be, nothing can make me sad and unhappy because I have someone who loves me - 1 person who makes up for all the suffering and sadness that I experience everyday. You don't need to have the whole world, all you need is 1 special person who'll love you and whom you'll love. There is your heaven."

Love can make you happy, and love can ruin your world. The more you're in love, the more dangerous is the game that you're playing... You may get high up in the clouds out of extreme happiness but you may also get your heart broken in a way that may eventually end your life. But if love is balanced and is very solid, the chances are that you won't break up or even fight.

Fallen victims of hatred and politics - The war in Lebanon

I should put my diary aside for a while and write about my military service later. I thought perhaps I should share my thoughts about the ongoing war between Hezbollah and Israel...

I've read several blogs and have been active in forums (topix.net) and I was glad to see that there are so many good people all around the world who are smart enough to understand the situation in the middle east, to see the truth amidst the lies, to rationalize and put anger & hatred aside.

The Lebanese and the Israeli people have a lot in common. Both sides want peace. Both sides suffer from the outcome of this war. (Although more Lebanese civilians get killed than Israeli) Many here may disagree, but Israelis express deep regret regarding the civilian deaths in Lebanon. We're all human beings, death of innocent people is tragic for all of us. I wish there was a way to prevent innocent people from dying, if only Hezbollah didn't operate within civilian houses...

To all the Lebanese citizens and the Northern Israeli citizens, I pray for your safety. Please take care of yourselves, and your families.

To all the injured civilians on both sides - I pray for your fast recovery.

To all the families who have lost their loved ones, I grieve over your tragic loss. It is incomprehensible. Let us pray that they're in a better place, a safe one and a peaceful one.

To everyone who reads this: Whoever you are, whatever your point of view on this war is, whether you agree with my opinion or not, let us all agree on one thing: There shall be no room for hatred in this world. Hatred includes racism, anti-semitism, anti-Islamism and so on. Hatred leads to wars, to injustice and to ruthless killing. Whatever we do or say, let it come from our rational thinking rather than from our anger and despisal. We're all equal human beings in this world. Although we may have different points of view, we all want peace. The only people who don't want peace are people who hate. So let us not hate and let our children not know what hatred is. Amen.

Let me finish with an optimistic suggestion on ending this war:
Once the Lebanese get enough courage to fight Hezbollah, Israel would withdraw its Army and cease fire. Instead, it would help the Lebanese - it would give them weapons and money. Then Lebanon would see what are Israel's true intentions. ;)

Gathering my thoughts

29th June, 2004

Before the army, I never really bothered reading books. I considered it a waste of time. One day I was sent to our battalion's base to guard there for a week or so. "Get yourself a book, it's boring out here", said one of my teammates on the phone when I was on my way to the base. You guard 4 hours and the rest 8. During these 8 hours you either sleep or do... nothing. People get bored easily, therefore books are a good, efficient way of spending free time. I decided to follow his advice and bought Michael Crichton's "Timeline" - I got carried away - it was the first time I didn't look at the page number while reading, or said something like: "one more page and that's it!".

Lately, I've been thinking about how I'm gonna spend time in the army in a productive way. It would be a good idea to study, read books, train my muscles - I've got 2 years to serve. That way, after I finish the army, I will feel that I've done something during my military service that contributed to my life.

This afternoon I was transferred to the settlement of Adora. My team is here.

My mom said that August flights are fully booked, but that I can be added to the waiting list. Meanwhile, I'll ask my commander about the possibility of flying to Germany. He'll find out if it can be authorized.

Tonight my Angel replied to my SMS even thought she wasn't allowed to. She said she can't live without writing me and that she would do anything to meet me this summer!

Earlier today, the electric fence surrounding the settlement has triggered the alarm. We had to put on our equipment (I had to wear MK77 - a heavy radio (12kg's) on my back) and run uphill about a kilometer in the heat of the sun. As usual, it was a false alarm - even a bird that touches the fence would trigger the alarm. That's why everybody calls it a "Smart-dumb alarm system". I guess I didn't sweat that much since the first days in the army, the days when you undergo basic training. Hope it won't happen again.

Dreams are meant to come true - The Beginning

28th June, 2004

I'm in the middle of my guarding duty in a watchtower located in northern Telem - a settlement in the West Bank, near Hebron. I'm spending my time thinking about my angel and about our upcoming week together, how to convince her mom to let her daughter go?

(I've been planning to finally meet Angel, after a year and a half of having internet relations, sms exchanging and rare phone calling... soon I will have a regila - a week long vacation during which I hope she'll be able to come. Because she's 17 years old, she has to get her mother's approval, which is currently the main problem because her mom won't let her daughter go to a foreign country alone, to a dangerous place to meet a 18 year old stranger who can be deceiving her on the Internet. It's a reasonable decision, any sane mom would do the same in her place.)

I don't want Angel to choose between me and her mom, or more precisely, to choose me and disappoint her mom. The runaway option (runaway from the army to Germany), although being a true alternative, has never been the primary solution and is definitely does not offer positive outcomes. I have 17 more days before I come home again - over 150 hours of guarding and planning.
While in the army, especially while on duty, I can't set my mind off my Angel. It is obvious that while the army causes depression and sadness within me, thoughts of my Angel bring back happiness, hope and ambition. In some cases, it feels like thinking of heaven while being in hell. In other cases though, when the air is clear and a breeze blows into your face, when a beautiful view opens up in front of you, you feel like you're in heaven... a heaven that lacks 2 of its most essential features: Angel's presence, and freedom. Without them, it's just an illusion, or perhaps - a vision, giving you the idea and the feeling of what's it going to be like, after the military service.

I came home on Thursday at 5:30pm and came back to the army on Saturday night. After 18.5 days I'll come home again... At home, I mostly watch movies with my mom and play PC games, surfing the Internet and chatting with my great girlfriend as often and as much as it is possible. It's incredibly great to be at home and incredibly sad whenever a thought crosses your mind: "soon I'll have to go back to the army and not see home for a looong time". At least that way you really learn to appreciate what you have, value your home and your freedom.

I'd write and fill the whole diary with praises to Angel, saying for billions of times over and over again how much I love her, but words would never be able to describe the strength of my love to her.

Tonight my mom called me and told me some good news: A high ranked officer who is a friend of hers had said that any soldier who served over a year in the army can fly abroad during his regila. "If anyone gives you trouble with that, go to the City's Officer." (It's a military office for soldiers to complain to while on vacation. Usually soldiers go there to fake illnesses and get extra vacation days.) :) Hopefully...

3 more days and I'll be able to receive e-mails from Angel. Her mom doesn't allow her to SMS anymore due to high phone bills. -.- I want to try the mobile phone's chat service and chat with her, depending on the price.

Prologue - A short biographical background

I was born in former USSR in 1985. In January 1991, after the collapse of the Soviet Union (its borders became open for immigration) my whole family moved to Israel.

I grew up in a small town located in the southern part of Israel. After 10 years (Dec 2000), following my parents' divorce, I moved with my mom and my brother to Tel-Aviv, where I graduated in 2003.

The same year, just 2 weeks after I turned 18, I was drafted into the military service.

I maintained an online contact with a girl (we'll refer to her here as "Angel") from Germany. Throughout the year, despite the distance, our relationship had suddenly become serious and thus we decided that no matter what, we'll meet each other and be together. (What may seem to many as a pointless and impossible relationship would later prove to be a romantic love story with a lesson for all.)

The army soon became an obstacle. I hoped to either skip the military service, hoping to meet her earlier (skipping the army would have cost me a month or two in a military jail, which isn't suitable to me at all, besides Angel was against it, she didn't want me sitting in jail) but then decided against it.

If not skipping the army, then at least serving where I wouldn't regret spending 3 years of my life... That would be... computers... something with computers. Unfortunately (or perhaps eventually fortunately), my request was rejected. The army saw me fit to serve as a combat soldier in an Artillery battalion. At first I refused as I was told by my friends that stubbornness on the drafting day can eventually get me to where I desire to be, but after a day in a detention cell (a punishment for refusing a command to draft to the Artillery training base) I changed my mind and obeyed.

The basic training ("Tironut") was really hard for me. It was still a period when soldiers in "Shivta" (the name of the training base) had to carry Galil weapons - long and heavy pieces of iron assault rifles. After 2 months of basic training I gave up on trying to actively drop out of the training as a combat soldier, but continued to hope that my fate would eventually get me where I want.

I feared serving in the territories. Long before the army, I had a terrible nightmare of me parting with all my relatives and going to the army to never come back again. For some reason I feared this nightmare as if it were some kind of a prophecy. Since then I decided to avoid the army at all costs... but here I am, serving as a combat soldier in the territories...

It seems that the army knows better than us where it's most suitable for us to serve. Looking back, I don't regret having served in an Artillery battery, as both an Artillery soldier and a standard infantry soldier in the territories. I've served in all parts of Israel, on all borders - Egypt, Jordan, Lebanon and Syria. I've learned a lot from my experience and the experience of other soldiers, I've visited many new places in Israel where I have never been, where I would have never visited, I've met a lot of good people (and bad people as well) and despite all the difficulties of being a combat soldier, despite missing home for weeks, I am proud I have gone through it like a man.

Let me conclude the prologue...

August 2003 - 4 months of basic training in the Negev desert
December 2003 - Advanced Artillery training in the Golan Heights
January 2004 - Hermesh settlement protection & motorized patrols in the region (Near Jenin)
End of January - 2 months of protecting the Maccabim area (The town of Maccabim-Reut, route 443, Beit Sira and Beit Likya)
March 2004 - Joined the A battery as a fresh soldier. (After 8 months, you either join a battery of "senior soldiers" or take a commander's course of 4 months, after which you become an Artillery team commander. I didn't want no responsibility for the lives and fates of other people and decided to try joining the A battery. A battery consists of mostly nice and shy soldiers. B battery consists mostly of hooligans and troublemakers)
In the A battery I served in the area of Rantis. (near the town of Halamish, village of Budrus, during the fence construction there)
April 2004 - Took a 40-day commander's course with infantry soldiers (It's a different course which gives you the skills but in the Artillery corps, it's worth nothing... They hoped I would continue and take an officer's course, I passed the exams but refused, it wasn't obligatory. I didn't want to become an officer because officers have to serve at least 4 years... 3 years was long enough for me)
June 2004 - I got back to the battery as a regular soldier and after an Artillery training in the north, we were assigned near Hebron. (Hebron, Halhoul, the settlements of Telem and Adora) That's where I started writing the diary...

My next post begins with my first diary entry as a combat soldier in the area of Hebron. My experiences, my personal life, the way Palestinians live and the way the soldiers live and the consequences of the siege that was laid on Hebron when a suicide bomber from Hebron exploded in the southern city of Beer Sheva...