Nothing will stand between us

15th August, 2004

I talked to Yair on Sunday evening. He said that it most likely won't be a problem to release me on September 15th! That's great news! I asked him if it's possible to release me on 9th, switch with one of the soldiers from the 1st platoon or something. He replied negatively, saying that it will be difficult to do and may cause all kinds of problems. (If I switch vacations with one of the soldiers from the 1st platoon, things won't be organic anymore. When I'll be at the base, my team and another team from my platoon will be home and I'll be with the 1st platoon most of the time even though I don't belong there.)

Yair said I'll know the final answer tomorrow. I really must hurry, because my mom will fly abroad in 4 days and won't be able to order tickets. (She knows much better than me about all the tour agencies, where to find the cheapest available flight and so on) I might be sent to a pillbox again on 17th and won't be able to send the papers on time as I won't be at the base where the desk-work soldiers are.

While I was guarding and patrolling, I suddenly noticed an officer standing near the guarding post. He told me he was standing there for quite a long time, checking how well I guard by sitting a meter from the post, throwing a rock to the bushes and all kinds of things. He said I should be more alert, not for his sake, but for the sake of protecting the base.

That shocking encounter definitely made me more alert... more alert to bored and annoying officers that sneak on soldiers at night! ....... *sigh* 4 hours of guarding is so boring and tiresome, especially at night. How can he expect me to be concentrated all the time?!

















16th August, 2004

This evening Yair finally gave me the dates! 13th-20th September. I called my mom and she started looking for available tickets for these dates. It's not easy to find tickets for specific dates, and ticket availability is not a certainty especially since Rosh Ha Shana (the Jewish new year) is celebrated on 14th.

I sent an SMS to my sweetheart and asked her to find out if her mom lets us travel, stay in hotels and let her skip school for 4 days.

The night of 17th. It was 2:15a.m. I was guarding at the bunker with Ofir when I received an e-mail from Angel. I read it on my old (Samsung 624) cellphone. She talked to her mom and these are the results: Her mom won't let her skip school at all, but I can stay at her place and wait for her to come home from school everyday, and on the weekend we can travel somewhere and stay in a hotel.

Thinking about it thoroughly... What will I do at her place all by myself? I'll fly to Germany and have only 7 very short days every minute of which I'll want to spend with her.

Will they really let me, a complete stranger, stay alone at their place? Will her mother let us go to a hotel on the weekend? I sent 4 messages to Angel asking her to talk to her mom, to try and convince her in various ways to let her skip school for just these 4 days or otherwise it just won't work. It's the beginning of the school year anyway. Nothing useful is taught on those days.

In other words I was very disappointed about it. At first it was planned that she'll come to Israel and I'll show her the whole country and make it an unforgettable experience, but her mother forbid her to come and left us with one alternative - I come to Germany. Now her mother is making it even more difficult.

From 2:15 until the end of my guarding shift at 6a.m. I'd been thinking about this problem, hopefully the last obstacle to our dream-meeting. I don't wanna cope with seeing her for only half a day. I asked Angel to e-mail me as soon as possible, and also to tell me what time I could call her.

I had to pack - move to Telem. Now I can't send the papers. I'll only be able to send it on 24th, the last day before I go home. (We're usually taken to the base on the day before going home. I might not be able to visit the base until then.)

I received Angel's e-mail. "Maybe we should see each other in April" she wrote. "I will be 18. Independent from my mother."

She was probably in despair after my messages. She wrote she felt hopeless, that it would be pointless for me to stay at her place while she's in school.

I can imagine myself sitting at school, half-listening to the teacher, knowing that there's a girl who came all over from Germany just to be with me and is waiting for me at my home while I'm stuck in school... and not just a girl, but the girl I'm in love with.

My mom offered Angel to talk to her mom and try to sort things out, but Angel said it won't help.

I was in despair.

When I arrived to Telem, I had a phone talk with my mom. I told her that I would still meet her. It doesn't matter how little time I will have to share with her, I'm going to meet her no matter what. Eventually we will find a solution. Maybe her mom won't be that strict when she meets me. But my mother suggested that I find a girlfriend in Israel. That's what everyone tells me! I feel like I had lost my mother's support. Now there's absolutely nobody who supports me on meeting Angel. I feel so alone, so sad. Soon Angel and mom will both fly abroad and I'll be alone even more. =(

It's tearing me apart. I hope Angel's not feeling that way. We should both stay strong, everything will work out just fine...

I called her and we had a long conversation and it was worth every second! =) I'm very very happy now. We might be able to rent a hotel in town and she'll only have 3-4 hours of school everyday. She told me she suggested that we meet in April because I wrote "It won't work" in one of my SMS messages. But it would work! I was wrong! I was just very disappointed and I didn't want to accept the bad news last night. All is great! Except the phone bill... It's not too high, but is not okay either.

As I said: everything is going to be alright. We finished our conversation, both feeling very happy. I'm gonna meet her and it will be grrrrrrrrrrrrrrreat!!! =)